I'm not sure many people realize just how little things, material things mean until they find themselves with nothing. It doesn't matter whether you have the whole world or whether all you have is a rock you just stooped to pick up out of the dirt--in the end you will still be empty. So empty, without Christ. I always heard growing up in a Christian home that there is a God-shaped hole in all our hearts, and it wasn't until I found myself completely empty that I realized how true that really is. There is a God-shaped hole in every heart, because every man was made to be with God, and every man rebelled. I rebelled. I walked away. I faltered, and I fell. But God is sovereign, and God is faithful even when we are not.
So as I sit here, looking around me and cherishing every moment I have left in this house that I have called my home since the day I was born, I realize again that God is sovereign. I may not, okay definitely do not, understand why, or what purpose God has in this, but I know He has one, and I also know that His plans are to give me a future and a hope. Even though I'm sitting here near-hopeless and at the point of weeping away all moisture in my body, I trust Him. Because I know that whatever happens and whatever may come, He is with me, and I am precious in His eyes, even though the whole world despise me--even though the whole world, it seems, is searching to draw the life-blood out of my veins and spill it on the ground, I will give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God.
So I'll sit here and listen to the crickets chirp, and feel the breeze blow sweet and low. I'll be thankful for the time I have, and not bitter about the time I don't.
